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There Were Three in the Bed and the Little One Said….. »
Posted on April 22nd, 2008 by Paul Woodhouse in PPC, Paid Search, Search Engines | 1 Comment

It’s happened again.

I’m sure I’ve bored you previously with some of my wife’s dream tales, but I don’t know whether I’ve mentioned that I also wind up in her dream dog house.

Most guys’ lives are tense enough with their better half’s incessant suspicions as to whatever particular reason they have for being particularly suspicious without coming a cropper during her sleep.

The other morning, I was sat checking my emails waiting for Steph to hurry up with my caffeine explosion, when she sidled over, scowled at me and plainly accused me of cheating on her in one of dreams during the night.

No “Good Morning, sweetheart” or anything remotely friendly beforehand, just a straight out accusation of sleep-induced witnessed adultery. I didn’t help matters by grinning smugly as she divulged certain details - especially considering I obviously had it going on in her dream due to me exiting a ‘van full of girls’ (or would that be exciting?).

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A 1.0, and a 2.0, and a 3.0 - The Semantics of a Clever Web »
Posted on April 15th, 2008 by Paul Woodhouse in SEO, Search Engines, Social Media | Leave A Comment

View of Pendle Hill overlooking Nelson from outside my local pub.

This past week I’ve been unceremoniously reminded on more than one occasion of my old stomping ground via the medium of TV. I’m originally from a place called Nelson, which is in the borough of Pendle that sits next to Burnley. Not everybody has necessarily heard of Nelson in the UK, so Burnley, which they have, is used as its geographical surrogate. Over here, there’s very little point mentioning either, so it makes sense to use the mighty Manchester to explain my roots - even though I would never claim to come from there.
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Pills ‘n’ Thrills and Bellyaches »
Posted on January 18th, 2008 by Paul Woodhouse in Internet, Marketing, Search Engines, Social Media, Web Credibility | Leave A Comment

It’s official! I am comedy gold - well maybe bronze; and I’ll probably have to give that back once I fail my urine test.

For the past couple of nights I’ve been as funny as Jon Stewart without his writers.

Do you recall his skit a couple of nights ago about the political magpie Mitt Romney and his catchy, spontaneous banter with his supportive minions where Mitt would say something and the crowd would yell, “But they haven’t!”, in a ridiculously lame attempt to piggyback and emulate Barack’s “Yes, we can.”?

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The Mitchell Report - What the Implicated Should Do from a(n Internet) Marketing Perspective »
Posted on December 13th, 2007 by Justin Seibert in PPC, Paid Search, SEM, SEO, Search Engines | 11 Comments

For as busy as I am, I waste WAY too much time on sports. I mean, what do they add? The good times are greatly outweighed by the bad. And if I do try to draw parallels from the sports world into internet marketing, often times the results are usually disastrous for all involved.

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Google Eyeballs Paid Goons »
Posted on December 3rd, 2007 by Paul Woodhouse in Online Advertising, PPC, Search Engines | Leave A Comment

While we’re still making sure that everything is screwed down nice and tight before everything gets switched, it might be an idea to actually post something. If truth be told we’ve been raring to go since last week but there appears to be a problem or three regarding some of the redirection from this blog to the new one. But panic ye not - we have a back-up plan that we can implement once we’ve got Thanksgiving out of the way.

While we’re on the subject of blogging, or at least while I’m on the subject of blogging, there’s been an almighty brouhaha going on of late relating to Google’s steely cyber stare to various site owners and bloggers engaging in paid linking and now they’re fixing their gaze on pay per posters.

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The Yahoo! Junk Boom Effect vs The Facebook Baby Boomer Blitz »
Posted on October 17th, 2007 by Paul Woodhouse in PPC, Search Engines, Social Media | 2 Comments

Every once in a while my fellow search compadre here at Direct Online Marketing™ Towers, Katie, will amaze me with a succinct summing-up of a particular aspect of the search marketing landscape.

During a recent analysis of a rather sizeable pay per click campaign that we’ve just snagged, her notes alluded to something called ‘The Yahoo! Junk Boom Effect’.

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How Come I Never Saw Elvis Leaving the Building? »
Posted on August 26th, 2007 by Paul Woodhouse in Local News, Local Search, SEO, Search Engines, Social Media, Web Credibility | Leave A Comment

This weekend I literally went to the dogs as opposed to metaphorically which probably happened over a decade ago if truth be told. My father-in-law and his girlfriend (why does that always sound peculiar when applied to anyone over the age of 40? Still, I refuse to use the term ‘partner’) came down for the weekend and we decided to take in the delights of Wheeling Island. Continue reading →

Hey Big Spender! »
Posted on August 1st, 2007 by Paul Woodhouse in Online Advertising, PPC, Paid Search, Search Engines | Leave A Comment

I have a buddy back in Blighty who is married to the daughter of the former chief clerk of our local council. Now the chief clerk of the council holds all the purse strings when it comes to whys and what for’s of local public spending. For example, they get to decide who gets to do the work once a project is decided upon. Whether these are ongoing concerns such as parks, pavements and other related civic expenditure or one-offs they tend to give the nod.

You may recall a certain Mrs. Thatcher during the eighties - I know I do. Well under her leadership, we in Britain were given the opportunity to become more acquainted with the concept of public/private partnership. In a nutshell, everything that could be deregulated and decentralized was and opened up to competitive tender. Continue reading →

Serendipitous Searching? »
Posted on July 23rd, 2007 by Paul Woodhouse in Paid Search, SEM, SEO, Search Engines | Leave A Comment

I’ve simply got to come right out and say it - I’m no fan of country music.

In fact, I hate it. I don’t hate people who listen to it, I just don’t personally care to listen to it. (Does that afford me enough wriggle room?)

Nor am I saying that the music I listen to is in any way better. I can assure the vast majority of people would find the sort of stuff I listen to the equivalent of having their ears syringed with hot cheese. It’s an acquired taste to put it mildly.

Although I’ve had Jamboree in the Hills mentioned once or twice, I wasn’t fully prepared for its full exposure on Thursday’s TV. That redneck run, or whatever it’s called, left me slack-jawed with amazement. I’ve never seen such fat chaps run so fast.

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Could You Sleep Without Google? »
Posted on July 8th, 2007 by Paul Woodhouse in E-commerce, PPC, Search Engines | Leave A Comment

Would somebody be so kind to inform me as to whether one is not only over the hill but quickly hurtling down the other side of it if the highlight of one’s weekend is purchasing a new bed? At what point in your life does this kind of thing become so frighteningly prominent? When does the idea of falling asleep on a Saturday night become the most interesting aspect of Saturday night?

I’d love to tell you I’m looking particularly gorgeous this Monday morning due to a weekend of uninterrupted beauty sleep on a brand spanking new mattress, but I’d be lying. Firstly, it’d take considerably longer than a weekend to put my pudgy face right. I’ve also had the mother of all toothaches – one of those blighters that doesn’t care how much it costs to rectify it - all weekend, which has hardly afforded me a wink.

I know, cry me a river. But, you’ll be pleased to know that my considerably better half has had a log of a time. Continue reading →

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