This Particular Blog Entry is Really, Really Neat

The esteemed Sir Paul Woodhouse (I knighted him the other day with the office ketchup bottle) and I were having a conversation seconds ago while the big boss-man was on the phone (he runs a tight, AIM-only ship here at DirectOM thanks to Paul’s cockeyed accent). Since our conversations usually start off on a decent note (“Would you like to get Quiznos for lunch?”) and always end on a ridiculous topic (“I swear! You don’t have to pay income taxes! It’s not a law!”), this particular blog will probably follow the same course.

BUT – as always – I’ll try to bring it all back at the end in a way that makes you say, “OK, just give me two minutes of my life back, not all five.”
Anywho, I told Paul a bit ago that “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” was a hilarious flick, to which he responded, “Neat.”

Now, for years I’ve been arguing that the word “neat” when used on its own is THE quintessential conversation killer.

Think about it: if you’re telling someone a story and they respond with “neat,” you’ve got no choice but to put your tail between your legs and hang your head in shame. In fact, try it out the next time your significant other is telling you something pointless (a suggestion which clearly answers the question, “Why is Derrick the only unmarried employee at DOM?”).

Anyways, long-story-short, Paul rejuvenated the conversation by stating that he wants to see the movie so that he can watch Russell Brand in action. Now, I don’t know who Russell Brand is, but seeing as how Paul is a Redcoat, and there is only one person in the movie with an English accent, I figured he meant this guy. Paul mentioned that on the Mother Isle, Russell was a famous presenter – a term which apparently equates to Ryan Seacrest (and that brings me to the point of this blog).

Paul claims that Ryan Seacrest is no taller than 5’2″. Now, being the upstanding and respectable musician that I am, I refuse to watch American Idol (and I certainly won’t link to it!), so I’m not sure if that’s an accurate claim or not. But, if there’s one thing I’ve learned while working here it’s that everything can be answered by Google, except of course for “French military victories“. Anyways, I typed in, “How tall is Ryan Seacrest?”

Do you know what I found? I found a THRIVING community of individuals who sit around and discuss the height of celebrities!

… to each their own.

So, my question to you is this: if somebody was able to build a successful site based around unknown heights of celebrities, why aren’t you working to build a thriving community of XYZ’s who really enjoy your ZYX’s?

Seriously. Think about it.

There are plenty of people out there who are interested in what you do and want to interact with either you or other like-minded individuals about whatever it is that your company does. It’s called a niche… and they are usually full of weirdoes who enjoy spending their money.

So, I urge you to find your niche and exploit it, but in a positive way.

You know, give those crazy kids looking for doggy-sunglasses a place to post their pictures. Help those techno-geeks locate a vintage 1982 IBM motherboard.

My point is this: it doesn’t matter what you do or how uninteresting you think your service or product is. Somebody out there will think it’s neat and – chances are – once it starts impacting your wallet, you will too.